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An American author and humorist, Mark Twain is known for his witty works, which include books, essays, short stories, speeches, and more.While not every single piece of written work was infused with humor, many were, ranging from deadpan humor to laugh-out-loud funny.I think it is the worst I ever saw…’ He published everything as ‘The Jumping Frog: In English. Then Clawed Back into a Civilized Language Once More By Patient, Unremunerated Toil.’A satirical essay written in 1879, ‘A Presidential Candidate’ makes fun of the campaign process and explores the ideal candidate or in Twain’s words ‘a candidate who cannot be injured by investigation of his past history…’ If the candidate did, indeed, expose all his ‘wickedness’ then his opponents could not use his past against him.
While funerals are serious, Mark Twain manages to make the subject funny in ‘At the Funeral,’ a short essay in which the humorous writer gives his take on proper etiquette when attending such an event.
For example, the attendee must not ‘criticise the person in whose honor the entertainment is given’ and definitely ‘make no remarks about his equipment.’ Also, the attendee should only ‘be moved…according to the degree of your intimacy’ with the people hosting the funeral or the deceased.
Twain caught wind of it and translated it back into English but using the grammatical structure and syntax of the French language.
As he points out, ‘the Frenchman has riddled the grammar.
He had a bit of remorse, so he returned the watermelon to the owner.
This is Mark Twain after all; therefore, he told the owner ‘to reform.’ The owner, in turn, gave Twain a ripe melon, and Twain ‘forgave’ the owner.
For example, one piece of ‘advice’ Twain shares is ‘If you mother tells you to do a thing, it is wrong to reply that you won’t.’ He writes that little girls should act as they will do what they’re told but that ‘afterward act quietly in the matter according to the dictates of your best judgment.’ This piece also has recommendations on how take chewing gum from little brothers, how to treat friends who have better toys, plus several more little gems.
Please select from the following short essay sets: Georgetown Short Essay Set | Duke Short Essay Set | Dartmouth Short Essay Set | Harvard Short Essay Set Note: The following essays were not edited by Essay Edge Editors.
And lastly, as only Twain would point out, ‘Do not bring your dog.’.
He recalled the first time he ‘removed’ (stole) a watermelon from a wagon; once he looked at it, he realized it was not yet ripe.